stop

Did you know that 15 minutes after 9/11 the world's magnetic field completely spiked...Because the world's emotions joined together! We are more interconnected that we may think. 

Brenda Lana explains the challenges our teachers face to meet all the demands of running 35+ students in a class and addressing the issues our children have.  As difficult as it is, as teachers and educators we need to not assume that all kids come into class with processing skills in place.

Science CAN proves how interconnected we are. This video by Heartmath shows how we can all collaborate in creating peace in the world.  

Even though this is no laughing matter, this short segment by Comedy Central reveals the true reason of how bullied become bullies, how they think and the cycle of this never ending painful abuse. 


 Here is what to do if your child is being bullied


  1. Praise your child for coming to you for help. It takes a lot of courage for a child to tell an adult that they’ve been bullied. Reassure them that they are not alone, it’s not their fault, and that they’ve done the right thing coming to you. Offer comfort and support. Watch and read all info on our BULLIED page together.
  2. Stay calm! Don’t react with anger or disappointment. Provide a safe and peaceful environment for your child to tell you everything about the incident.
  3. Never blame your child. Never approach the bully’s parents. Never advise your child to engage in fighting the bully or to do what’s done to them. Encourage your child to come up with peaceful solutions and practice roll playing: Ignore and walk away. Tell the bully to STOP with a firm voice and continue to walk away. Go to a crowded place and stay with friends. Talk to an adult you trust.
  4. Make a note of it all… the names of the children involved, the time, and the place at school. You will need all this information before you see the school counselor or principal.
  5. The school principal is your best friend! Make an appointment to discuss solutions. Be calm and state all the facts. Remember that you both want the safety of your child.
  6. Check back with your child and the school to make sure the problem is resolved.



​ Here’s what to do if your child is bullying

  1.  As a parent or school informs you that your child is bullying, stay calm and listen to the details of the incident. Do not get defensive or angry. As hard as it is, this is a wake-up call that your child needs help. Reassure the caller that you will talk to your child.
  2. Talk to your child and listen to his/her side of the story. Don’t interrupt or overreact since keeping the line of communication open is essential.
  3. Let your child know that any kind of bullying behavior is unacceptable and you will support schools policy to make sure this does not happen again. Watch and read all info on our BULLY page together.
  4. Take a deep breath and evaluate the situation. You know your child best; try to figure out why he bullies. Here are some common reasons why:  Your child hasn’t learned how to manage anger, frustrations, or other strong emotions. Your child has learned aggression from home or someone who bullies him. Your child needs to learn cooperative ways to work out conflicts and differences. Your child is feeling insecure and bullying makes him/her feel important. Your child is in the midst of a stressful life event.
  5. Teach the appropriate behavior. Get help from the teachers, school counselor or a therapist and consider a behavioral evaluation with a psychologist if your child has a history of arguing, defiance or has trouble controlling anger. Encourage having compassion, understanding, tolerance, and accepting differences. Talk about the importance of friendship and kindness.
  6. Be the example. Watch how conflicts are being handled at home because chances are your child is copying that behavior! Demonstrate how to resolve conflicts with peace and respect. Make sure at home there’s no yelling, name-calling, putdowns, harsh criticism, or physical violence happening between adults or siblings.  



  Here's what to do if your child is a bystander

          

Studies show that more than 50% of bullying stops within 10 seconds if a bystander steps in to help. However, it is very important that your child knows how to stay safe while trying to redirect the situation. Please watch and read all info on our BYSTANDER page together for suggestions and insights.

           

PLEASE WATCH OUR VIDEOS, BE THE CHANGE, AND TEACH OTHERS. 

A beautiful animation about a boy who gets bullied. Look for the signs and help your youngster before it's too late. 

Does playing too much video games make you more aggressive? Does it increase bullying behavior? Super Teacher, Brenda Lana explains how balance is the key.

Ms. Kelly McKinnon Bermingham,  MA, BCBA, Director of Behavior Intervention at the Center for Autism and Neurodevelopmental Disorders in Santa Ana, and owner/clinical director of Kelly McKinnon and Associates in San Juan Capistrano, California. Kelly McKinnon explains the importance of Ability Awareness Project and our responsibility as parents and educators to create a safe bully-free environment for our children.​

Ms. Brenda Lana is the Owner and Executive Director of Pathfinders, a unique learning center based in Rancho Santa Margarita, California. She is certified as Dyslexia Remediation Specialist and has worked at the Orange County Department of Education as a Reading Resource Teacher in Special Education where she trained teachers in reading instruction and facilitated classroom instruction. She has spent the past several years studying the latest research about the brain and has been trained in specialized programs to retrain the brain and develop underlying skills.

As parents we need to remain open and flexible, learn what we need to learn so we can lead our next generation towards a more humanistic, united, and interconnected path.


The statistics are all over the news and the internet. It's mind boggling to see 8 year olds taking their own lives due to bullying. There are pages and pages of similar stories and worst of all, bullying is on the rise. It is a serious problem and no one should take it lightly. Unfortunately, only 20-30% of children who have been bullied tell an adult and when they do, you need to be prepared to deal with it correctly. Bullying should not be a part of growing up and needs immediate attention. We need to learn everything there's to know about bullying to educate ourselves and be able to set a good example for others.


"When you know better you do better" Maya Angelou. To help stop bullying, we need to start with our own family, school and community. First and foremost we should stop threatening, manipulating, hitting, ridiculing, belittling or hurting our children and everyone else around us. If we want our children to learn to deal with conflicts with respect and in a peaceful manner, we need to be willing to be respectful and talk out differences peacefully with the people around us. We need to invite diversity into our lives and treat everyone equally, with kindness and respect. Leading by example is the most affective way to teach our children anything we want them to learn. 



"Live so that when your children think of fairness, caring & integrity, they think of you."  H.J. Brown Jr.

Parents,

IT'S NEVER TOO LATE TO LEARN!

"As a new parent, 15 years ago, I thought I knew exactly how to parent. I love children, had a pretty good childhood myself, had read every book and article there is about parenting and even though a music major, I had taken all child and adolescent psychology courses at college... and was already a pretty good cook! Seemed like I was set, right? WRONG!!

As time went by it became apparent to me that my precious little boy did not fit into any categories I had read about in books or studied at college. Neither my knowledge nor my experiences mattered because who he needed me to be was so different than who I wanted and was ready to be. And so did my new journey began!" Founder. 

This video by Burger King shows how people, even adults have a hard time stepping up to defend a child getting bullied.

Keaton Jones, a Tennessee middle schooler, is speaking out after an emotional Facebook video about being bullied. In the widely-shared video, he describes how fellow students poured milk on him and stuffed food in his clothes. Now, his mother is addressing backlash on social media. Mark Strassmann reports.

It's so hard to know what your teenager is going through as you want to allow them to have a bit of independence. This heartbreaking video is a good reminder for all of us to keep talking to our teenagers, keep loving them, keep giving them words of affirmation to lead them towards their goals and passions before it's too late.   


Learn to 

Children sharing their painful stories of enduring bullying... a very informative video on bullying statistics making us realize how we can no longer afford to let this continue. 

This short animation shows a bully in the making! Bullying is a learned behavior ... one child can teach it to another and the vicious cycle continues on. 


This video has had over 175 million views since 3 years ago. It reveals, so beautifully, the heart of a boy getting bullied and his prayers. "Hopeful" by Bars & Melody.